Re: MIA: Bracelet Unites Two Women

Date: June 16, 2004

"MISSING IN ACTION: Bracelet unites women

Pair finally meets after writing to each other for two decades

Associated Press

WATFORD CITY, N.D. - A bracelet worn for a North Dakota soldier missing in Vietnam has brought two women together after more than two decades.

"There really are nice people in the world," said Drusilla Zubke, 77, after meeting Bonnie Barrett, 36, the keeper of her son's missing-in-action bracelet.

Barrett, of Tottenville, N.Y., has worn a bracelet in memory of Sgt. Deland Zubke of Grassy Butte, N.D., since the early 1980s.

She brought his mother, Drusilla, a rancher of 50 years, to New York City for a Mother's Day week tour. The women had written each other for years but had never met.

A pledge

Barrett and others who wear bracelets in memory of missing soldiers pledge to keep them on until the soldier returns or his remains are found. The wearer then returns the token to the soldier or to his family.

Barrett said she decided to wear the bracelet when she was 14 years old. A friend's father, who was in the military, told her about the bracelet campaign during a leisurely card game, she said.

"He said, 'There are soldiers who fight for freedom. People who let you live like you do, playing cards ... Some people go away, and they do not come back,'" she said.

"For a 14-year-old, that got me thinking," she said. "It was something that stayed with me."

Band replaced

About six years ago, after the bracelet's red color faded to gray, it snapped in half. Barrett was heartbroken. Her fiance, Charles Vitallo, replaced it with a silver band.

Last month, Barrett handed Drusilla Zubke the broken pieces of the old band. They now are displayed with Deland's picture and other war memorabilia in the McKenzie County Veteran's Memorial Center in Watford City.

After 10 years of wearing the bracelet, Barrett wanted to find out more about the soldier from North Dakota. The identification bracelet gave only his name and home state.

Barrett said her search was as simple as dialing information and asking for the last name. But the initial phone call was difficult, she said.

"I was nervous" Barrett said. "You don't know how a person is going to react when so much time has gone by."

A decade of cards, letters and flowers followed for Drusilla Zubke on birthdays and holidays.

Barrett said this year, instead of taking her usual vacation, she opted to pay for Zubke's stay in New York and show her around the city.

"We took a carriage ride through Central Park, took a double-decker bus, saw the Empire State Building, rode on the ferry and saw the Statue of Liberty," Zubke said. "I wouldn't want to live there. I'd probably get lost walking to my neighbors'."

Deland Zubke enlisted in the Army shortly after graduating from high school in 1970. March 2, 1971, Drusilla and her late husband, Gerald, received the news.

"He (Deland) was only there two months when he came up missing," Zubke recalled. "When a guy from the Army came driving in, I knew something was wrong."

Deland was declared dead in 1978. A tombstone was brought to the cemetery, but the family has held no burial service.

She tries to make sense of Vietnam, but her son's disappearance makes that difficult. She now settles in Watford City for less stressful winters , and rents out her land.

Zubke has three sons, a daughter, 12 grandchildren and two great-grandchildren.

Barrett said she may come back to North Dakota after her wedding next year. The bracelet, with its new band, remains firmly on her wrist."